Tomorrow I go for more blood work... we have a new problem that is out of control...

I have been borderline diabetic for almost 20 years. I have been able to control it with a very strict diet. All of a sudden, nothing is working. My fasting sugars in the mornings are 146 - 165 they should be down around... 90 - 130. After meals, I have to wait 2 hours... these numbers should be.... less than 160 and they are 220 and higher. I did manage to get it down to 119 this afternoon but it was pure luck and stress... nothing else. I have 2 hours to wait to see what my last reading of the day is for tonight. My fingers are sore and the blood thinners make this a not so fun task.
Lilman got really scared today as my lancet was set too high and it cut deep and of course bled a great deal. I was in a hurry and didn't check the lancet set level, so it was my fault but he got really scared. I know I am not getting enough good protein right now, but it's been a real struggle to be able to eat lately... this is where the prayers come in.... I don't want to add a new diagnosis or more medications to the mix. I would like prayer that this is a short term problem and that a medication adjustment could take care of it. If not, that I will have the strength to deal with this new problem.

Took Ethan for his monthly Psych appointment with Dr. Jacobs and we have decided to stop the Ritalin completely and try a new medication. It is called Focalin XR. The wonderful thing about this one... ONCE A DAY & we can break it into juice or food. Our normal pharmacy doesn't carry it and can't even order it, so I called the hospital, they didn't have it either but the outpatient pharmacy in the new building, does carry it but not the pill form of what the Dr. ordered. They had 10mg's so they gave us 60 instead of 30 and he will just have to take 2 in the morning. I have never heard of this medication but the little I have learned this afternoon, it will either work or not, no inbetween. We will see. With Summer Fun coming up, I wasn't sure how we were going to do any meds as they won't issue the noon one, so this will take care of that problem.

I just can't handle how he has been acting lately and I will NOT allow him to rule our house the way he has been the past several weeks. All it is doing is making things worse for everybody. Even this afternoon with Ethan with me, seeing how hard I had to work to get him this medication, he was still combative tonight with homework. Gary is timing him to see how long it will eventually take him to complete it all... we are at 90 minutes and counting so far. It is now 7pm and he started at 430pm...of course he needs breaks evey so many minutes so this is taking forever, well not really as he WILL be in bed in 65 minutes. The hardest part about this... the SUN IS STILL SHINING... for those of you who aren't familiar with Kaneohe, we are on the windward side of O'ahu right up against a mountain range called the Ko'olau's. The sun is usually gone for the day at about 3pm with it getting dark around 6pm... so for it to be almost 7pm with sun still coming over the mountain... summer is on its way. The kids think this means that their days are longer... nope just means they will be in bed while it is still light out. I'm sorry if that makes me a bad mother to some, but I need to get things done also.

Shayla's dress is ready and set to go for her play. I need to get to the fabric store and get her material for her wings. I picked up a black feather boa the other night and will use that in correlation with the tulle. I have no clue what type of bird she will be but she will be GORGEOUS. If anybody is a good bird person, I would love to know if there is really a gold and black bird... Ro, I tried to get her to be a mejiro, even got her a beautiful green dress, but that was a no go, she wanted GOLD.

Okay, I need to get back to doing my estimates and bill paying... I hear child labor coming to take my trash... amazing how much trash you have when you can actually sit down and open WEEKS of mail.

Have a good night.